I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Randomize