we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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