there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
