This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I pour the whiskey from now on
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
