Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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