when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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