would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
