Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize