Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
