I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
