Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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