Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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