3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
