you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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