Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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