you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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