I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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