He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
