i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Randomize