I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
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