I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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