sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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