thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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