Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
