3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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