Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
