Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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