considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
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