Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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