he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize