We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
