Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
there was a trapeze. enough said
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
