God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
