If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
