You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
