my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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