fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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