U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
