Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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