In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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