it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
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you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
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And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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