just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
