it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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