yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
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