You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize