Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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