Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
