And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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