so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
