Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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