I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
